My mother’s name is Iris.  It doesn’t surprise me that there are so many beautiful meanings behind the flower named, Iris.  The flower that bares the name, Iris is linked to the definition of faith, hope, and wisdom, all qualities my dear mother possess.

Let me explain a few ways my mother displayed these qualities and thereby teaching me the meaning of a real friend. My mother is a problem solver.  If I tell her I have a problem, she will do everything in her power to help me solve it, or find information for me to get a resolution.  She even does this when I’m not really looking for a resolution, just a listening ear.  When  I let her know all I need is for her to listen, and then, I pour out all my woes of the moment to her, she listens sympathetically. She then tells me how sorry she is that I’m going through, whatever drama it is that I am presenting to her.

She is quite the listener to everyone she knows.  As long as I can remember, my mother has taken calls from friends and family, talking on the phone sometimes for an hour or more, compassionately listening and giving caring wise advice when needed.

My mother also taught me respectful fear of God and appreciation for him and his son Jesus.  She helped me build a relationship with God that has helped me through many of my problems and guided a great many of my decisions, that led to successful navigation to a happy life.

My mother has been married to my father for over fifty-one years.  In a world where people marry with the view that if their mate doesn’t act right they will leave them, my mother stayed steadfast with her husband and taught me to respect my father through his faults and mistakes.  My mother, also taught me to be a domestic diva.  I can cook, sew, clean house, paint, garden, change diapers and burp a baby, balance a checkbook, and so much more.

My mother did her job well as a parent, but also as a friend.

Iris:  Your Friendship Means So Much to Me; Faith; Hope; Wisdom and Valour; My Compliments

7 Signs you have real friends

  1. Self-acceptance

Most people think a friend just accepts you as you are.  They do, but a real friend takes this thought further by helping you to accept yourself.  They will not let you talk trash about yourself.  They will not find acceptable you tearing yourself down verbally, or physically, by allowing you to give into destructive behavior.  They will encourage you to watch what you eat, exercise more, quit smoking, observe your limitations so you don’t overdrink, and they don’t think it’s cools to live your life stoned dreaming of the life you could be living instead of actually living your dream life.

  1. Take responsibility

A real friend will show you the need to stop blaming other people for what is not right in your life and will help you to take responsibility for your mistakes and shortcomings.  A real friend knows that it is your mistakes that will help you learn and grow and if you waste time blaming your parents, your employers, your peers, or the environmental circumstances you are in as an excuse to do nothing in your life, you will not ever do anything great in your life.  They know no one is holding you back accept your unwillingness to try.

  1. Tell me when I’m being unrealistic

A real friend will tell you when you’re not being modest and putting too much on yourself.  They know unrealistic goals will lead to failures that are nearly impossible to recover from.

  1. Ready to throw a party

A real friend will celebrate your successes.  They are the first one to take you out for a drink, buy you an atta girl card, or hug you when your milestones are realized.  Your real friends will not become jealous or make snide comments about your struggles as you meet challenges to get to your destinations.

  1. Drop what they are doing to help you

A real friend knows when to drop what they are doing and be there for you.  They will come and pick you up when you can’t safely get home at two in the morning, or go to the doctor with you while you get a test done, so they can drive you home safely.  They will be there to help you with your flat tire, or give you a jump. They may even do as my cousin did, who came out of her warm cozy house, where she was in her pajamas nice and comfy, to pick me up in a snow storm, where I was stranded because the bus to take me home drove right past me at my stop.

  1. Forgiveness – Even when undeserving – (Waterbed, Left when friend called, forget anniversaries.

A real friend forgives you, especially when you don’t feel as if you deserve it.  On so many occasions my mother forgave me when I did selfish things like sell a waterbed she had loaned me, and then didn’t give her the money.  Once she came over to visit me, which was a big deal, because she had to climb stairs to get to my apartment, and she had real bad knees.  About five minutes after my mom arrived, my friend called to invite me over to hang with her and some other friends of ours and I agreed to do it, not thinking about how rude and selfish I was being.  I really hurt my mother with that one, but she eventually forgave me.  I still cringe when I think of these two incidents, and what her loving forgiveness means to me.

          7. Make me want to be a better person.

A real friend can see and then encourages your strengths.  They love you loyally, and always show you the way to the better person you really want to be.  Though they see your flaws, they treat you like you are already the perfect version of yourself.

Did I miss something?  Tell me who taught you how to be a real friend, and how they did it.


Did you know?   

More information below about the plant, Iris from

The juice of the fresh roots of the Iris, bruised with wine has been said to purge dropsy from a person.  There are old physics writings that state dropsy can be cured by the hand of man.  It also has been used to remove freckles from the skin.

Background: With prolific and various displays of colorful flowers, the genus is thought to be named for the goddess Iris of Greek mythology. From ancient times, iris was regarded as a symbol of strength and a connector to the divine- said to be central to the origin of the sceptre. Egyptians placed it into the head-dressing of the Sphinx. The prominent three petals of the blossoms connected to the virtues of faith, wisdom and courage.

The root, described in literature from the 15th century, was used for a variety of health benefits and very often for flavoring and scenting. It is an ingredient of the famous Bombay Sapphire gin.

Orris to attract love and to protect: During a waxing moon, place powdered orris root into a cloth bag with items that represent love. Squeeze it with your dominant hand and, thus, will your wish for love be fulfilled.

Recipe: Special Pan Pudding:10 thin pieces of dry bread, 2 c. milk, 2 eggs, 1 c sugar, 7 oz. melted butter, 1/3 c monukka raisins, 1 tsp powder of grains of paradise, 1 tsp powder of orris root
Break bread, place into lined pan. Cover with in milk and egg mixture. Spread the mixture of sugar, butter, fruit and powders. Bake until golden brown at 345 degrees. Cool and serve with love.

Applications: Emetic, cathartic, and diuretic

Orris Root (Root of Iris) is used medicinally for oral and dental health, bronchitis, diarrhea, liver congestion and dropsy.

Root powder is used in perfumery, potpourris and sachets, and for scenting and flavoring. Its scent is similar to violet. It is included in a variety of cosmetic formulas. The volatile otto of orris is a favorite scent fixative. The fresh root juice has been used to remove skin discolorations and freckles. The root yields a black dye. The flower yields a blue dye. The seeds are used as beads.

Description: This flowering plant grows to 3 feet tall, with bluish-green, narrow, flat, sword shaped leaves – the largest of all the species. Large, deep blue, or purplish-blue flowers bloom in spring, show three bending petals of faint purple, inclining to blue. Purple veins run lengthwise; the beard is yellow, three erect petals are bright blue, with faint purple lines. Flowers have an agreeable scent. The brownish creeping rootstock is thick, fleshy, spreading over the surface of the ground.


Infusion: 2 tsp of dried herb or powder to 1 c. boiling water. Infuse for 10 minutes. Strain.


There is no known negative safety information available for this herb.


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